The Beast (La bête)
The Cinema Snob finds an exquisite French film with some beastly action.
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Eccentric Cinema
ThatGuyWithTheGlasses
Pushing Up Roses
Cinemassacre
The Geek Den
Revolving Video
Shaun Millington
Shriek Freak Arrow in the Head
Leslie Jones Blastoff Network
I Spit on Your Taste
Vault of Horror
Bloody Disgusting
Varied Celluloid
Patrick Rodriguez
Avante Garde Theatre
DjDaymage Halloween Mix
Cheap Arse Film Review
Forgotten Junk
Banned From the Video Store
The Experience Cinematic
Fistful of Cult
Video Hero's Hollywood Rant
The Horror Channel
Full Moon Reviews
SFHFF Review
The Cinema Snob: The Beast (La bête)
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Unfortunately my page hates donate buttons and the link doesn't work, but if you would like to help out The Cinema Snob, my Paypal account is under thecinemasnob@yahoo.com
What, no midroll. I was expecting one in every video now. You should have explained in a previous video or a comment thread about how you intend to use them. (sarcasm)
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Actually Brad had a comment on the Paranorman/Oogiloves video that explained that it was his intention to never have a mid-roll ad for the Snob videos, and that it would probably be reserved for things like vlogs or in-theater movie reviews.
I don't really mind the mid-roll ads, but I do appreciate Brad trying to keep them to a minimum in his videos.
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Wow, tagged as sarcasm and it STILL went over someones head.
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Maybe High was being sarcastic.
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Nah.
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I'm willing to say my bad on this. Misread the tone of the post and missed the sarcasm tag. Allergy meds are a helluva drug.
My apologies, aaron.
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Maybe High was being sarcastic.
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Nah.
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I'm willing to say my bad on this. Misread the tone of the post and missed the sarcasm tag. Allergy meds are a helluva drug.
My apologies, aaron.
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No problem man. It happens to the best of us (not me though, I'm the best of the best)
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sar·chasm ('sär-"ka-z&m) : noun, The giant chasm between what is said and the person who doesn't get it.
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(See also: "weed of deceit")
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"That's not what an owl sounds like!!"
Gets me every time!!!!
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Granted, I'm beyond tired right now but for some reason "that's not what an owl sounds like" had me laughing for almost 5 minutes. Rocking review good sir, I was almost starting to miss the movies with horse fucking. Wait...no I wasn't.
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"That's not what an owl sounds like!!"
Gets me every time!!!!
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Granted, I'm beyond tired right now but for some reason "that's not what an owl sounds like" had me laughing for almost 5 minutes. Rocking review good sir, I was almost starting to miss the movies with horse fucking. Wait...no I wasn't.
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Two Snob videos so close together?? Is it already "Christmas Day!"?
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Lost it when you referenced Pillowpants.
The Snob looked like he enjoyed this one.
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Awesome. I was hoping you would do this one.
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I think I reviewed the comic book adaptation of this movie.
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can you link us that?
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A reference to The Shaggs!?
This episode was fucking awesome.
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At least now we know that the big glasses is the source of the Snob's power much like Linkara with his magic hat!
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So can we assume that the glasses cause a sort of Jekyll and Hyde transformation in Brad Jones? Or is it more likely that the glasses came from the Amityville house and are cursed?
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I wonder if that'll be mentioned in the new Snob movie?
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Woooh, un film français, j'aime bien, c'est classe.
If somebody want to know what the quote from Voltaire mean, here's the translation : "Worries dreams are in reality transient madness". And the letter at 12:30 is a long polite way to tell the girl to come to the living room when she feel ready.
De plus, on devrait trouver un cheval pour enculer Josh la fiotte. Un bon gros coup de baguette entre les miches devrait lui remettre les idées en place.
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D'accord.
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Did this review come from the suggestion in your comments section?... Cause i suggested that. Can point out other movies if you want...
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Brad I've always wanted to know, what do you think about films like Stalker or Siberiade? I've just been curious because you understandably hate movies where the director is deliberately slowing his movie down for a half baked point that he does not even know, but what about films by directors like Tarkovsky? May not be your cup of tea and that's fine, but I wanted to know if you thought elongating scenes to create an environment is ever justifiable.
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His head would explode if he ever watched "Stalker", "Solaris", "Andrei Rublyov"... even the movies of Tarkovsky's friend Sergei Parajanov who was more into making cinematic folk art would probably be beyond him.
I'm being serious; the sort of schlock he watches has geared his head for understanding that language of cinema; Soviet art cinema would be completely alien to him.
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You know, your comment was completely accurate. And brutally honest. That being said, I had to rewatch S.T.A.L.K.E.R after I read it. It is a masterpiece. Nothing can really describe the sheer power of that movie. Thank you for that!
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Are you under the impression that movies like ET The Porno are the only types of films I watch? Are you implying that I've never seen, or would enjoy or "understand" the movies you mentioned? I have seen them, I do enjoy them, and yes, Mensa Sam, I do understand them. I've watched an extremely wide variety of films all my life.
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Right on! Seems to me some people just can't comprehend that you can genuinely enjoy "trashy" movies at the same time as being an intelligent guy. It's a snotty, superior attitude that bugs the hell out of me. It's always struck me that the pretentious sorts tend to shy away from more blatantly entertaining movies (and media in general) and only own up to liking what they think other people perceive as "deep" or "complicated" films, whereas he people who actually are genuinely intelligent know that you should just like what you like. Somebody's enjoyment of a fun, mindlessly entertaining trash-fest in no way indicates that they wouldn't be able to comprehend something more cerebral, in fact it's more likely they're just enlightened enough to know that there's nothing at all wrong or shameful about enjoying something just cause it's damn well entertaining.
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And it only just occurred to me that I just pretty much unintentionally reiterated the message of The Cinema Snob Movie.
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The Voltaire quote say
Worried dreams are really a momentary madness...
not wure what he meant by that... I,m french and i can,t make sense of it from the VO
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The Beast in Space!? Dang, now I have to locate it.
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This film is proof that practical effects are better.
You can't fuck CGI.
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Goddammit. I never wanted to know how many licks!
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Didn't I see that ratdog fucking sequence in Bram Stoker's Dracula?
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I have been watching your videos for years. I have heard you say some hilarious stuff, but the line about the bees is easily the greatest thing anyone has ever said.
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Actually, that portrait looks more like Bea Arthur.
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@7:40 I LOVE "Bon Voyage, Charlie Brown"!!
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Another childhood favorite!
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From the title card, I assumed this was the French version of "The Geek". I was not disappointed.
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No Freddy Got Fingered joked?
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*whew* Does it make me weird that a film about beast-fucking comes as a relief after Gross Out?
Musique par Domenico Scarlatti. Translation: "music with no copyright is as cheap as free."
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Wow this one was funny as hell!
I know nothing happens in it story-wise but i kind of want to see this one! XP
I see the poster for part 2 stole a Julie Bell & Boris Vallejo painting as it's poster and that makes me want to see it more!
I like the crappy monster design but the more rat-like look of it is more my style of creature design!
I loved that scene you broke character that was hilarious!
I hate to tell you this seeing as ya'll tend to react to real animals dying in a film but those organs were real! and so was that dead sheep!
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About the letter:
Dear Lucy
Allow me to interrup your nap/sleep. I would be happy to invite you in the livingroom were we could salute with Madame your aunt and my father.
You cannot fathom the joy i feel thinking about what will come next. My heart is beating.
Your "some name"
Kinda hard to translate that, even tho french is my mother language.
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Oops, uncensored horse penis in one of the polaroids at 12:17.
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I give you mad props for the Shags reference. That harpsichord may have actually helped their sound...
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I'm actually familiar with this movie...because hey, when I see a link titled 'French Werewolf Porn'....what am I supposed to do, not click it?
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Wow, French exploitation cinema is weird
Not that there's anything wrong with that
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Jesus, this movie looked like a pile of dogshit. And your super snobby reactions confirmed that. Is this one of the worst movies you've ever seen?
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Uh, dingdong, this movie is a riff on the old French fairytale "The Beauty and the Beast", except here the concept is striped down to just a woman having sex with a man/animal creature. Watch Jean Cocteau's 1946 movie and you'll get what Walerian Borowczyk was parodying.
The worst movie I ever saw was "Zandalee", though the angry Cajun man-dance between Judge Rheinhold and Nicolas Cage was good for laughs.
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It's really frustrating to me how nobody on this website understands that this film is a parody. Not even Brad seems to realize this.
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I'm sure Brad realizes it. It seems to be a hallmark of internet reviewers to occasionally intentionally overlook a film's satirical elements and/or read into it more seriously than necessary in order to squeeze more jokes out of it and appeal to the audiences who just want to see "bad movies" get made fun of.
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Really? Out of ALL the films that have been featured on the Snob, THIS is the one you consider the possible worst? 'Las Vegas Bloodbath'? 'Nukie'? 'Gross Out'? 'Bat Pussy'? Those look like Oscar winners in comparison to a (mildly) respected French arthouse film?
No offense intended; my appreciation of Walerian Borowczyk aside, it still seems like a weird choice alongside the likes of 'Ax 'Em' or 'Night of Horror', but to each their own, I guess.
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I want to watch this movie now for some reason o_O
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So the snob is tackling 70's movies now well this movie does give me the idea that the French are quite odd.........But let's get back to the true stories on the 70's This review was actually fantastic.
Yet Amin the leader of Uganda had a movie I believe anyway back to the movies Ideal's
Great review looking forward to next weeks or should I say "Return to sleepaway camp" review.
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Um...the Snob has been spotlighting 70s movies since the beginning of the show.
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Awe....I was expecting a Fly by Night joke when the owl showed up
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Aww, I'm a bit "dissapointed" that there was no emphasis on the whole:
"And suddenly a guy in a crappy costume shows up and has fairly explicit sex with the girl with a rubber horse cock that cums"
part, because that's certainly one thing that you never forget after seeing the scene randomly elsewhere, lol..
I'm wondering what the hell the In Space one is about though for sure now, lol...
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Please review The Beast in Space!
I own it (in a region 0 boxset from Shameless Screen Entertainment also containing Mala Bimba de' Satana and Papuya! Love Goddess of the Cannibals) and it's a slice of grade A cheese!
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Actually, the director was Polish, he was only living in France.
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All those years of slogging through French immersion will finally be paid off.
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16:11 Ohai, Oancitizen.
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I think I'm the only one here who really understands how in poor taste this film actually within the context of French History.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Beast_Of_Gevauduan
By like at least 100 dead people (and maybe over twice that much) levels of poor taste.
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I do not really see how the movie would relate to the Beast of Gevauduan. Sure, it has a wolfmonster, but that is a common type of beast. And the Beast name alone is equally common.
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To be perfectly blunt...
this is was pretty boring and dull episode.
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I agree that Brad looked like he had fun with this one. A pretentious movie that's just as sleazy is right up his alley. Caligula, anyone?
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Hey, Brad, thought you might want to know about this:
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vision/manimal-tv-series-movie-sony-animation-370769
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the real question is how could a good christian like brad watch something like this
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Oh boy, this movie. Wanna see a woman have sex with a hairy beast in the woods? You're gonna have to wade through several minutes of trying to get the Vatican on the phone first.
You watched in English, I suspect, because the subtitles ran out? I downloaded subtitles from the internet, myself.
Incidentally, the original language version is multilingual, with some scenes in English, such as that one with the chauffeur.
"Is anything gonna fucking happen?" I thought the same thing.
Actually, I think Maturin was the son of the beast and that woman. He can't actually be the beast, because that woman screwed the beast to death.
But what really, happened, of course, was that the director had two segments that didn't make it into his film /Immoral Tales/, and while one was prudently turned into a stand-alone short film, the one about a woman having sex with a beast was sloppily edited into a feature film with a new, boring-as-hell framing device.
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Well, at least this movie had a monster in it. That's a heck of a lot better than Monster in a Box (1992).
La Bete even had a beast with two backs.
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I cant believe it!! I did a review for this about a month ago, and i tried sending you a link to that review, thinking that you might like it! anyway, id be honored if you checked out my reaction and thoughts on THE BEAST! If you do check me out, please let me know, so i can scratch that off my goals list. lol Hope you get some laughs, and enjoy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2FrjB-rmmI&feature=plcp
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Eugh! Insert Death Bed reference here!
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Another great episode Brad. I was surprised you made a Shaggs reference, funny! Also loved the Herbie Reloaded joke.
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Letter at 19:48:
"Dear Lucy,
Allow me to interrupt your rest. I would be glad to ask you to come down to the boudoir where we could introduce ourselves in the presence of your aunt and my father. You cannot imagine the joy I feel at the thought of what is to occur. My heart beats. Your Mathurin"
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Letter at 19:48:
"Dear Lucy,
Allow me to interrupt your rest. I would be glad to ask you to come down to the boudoir where we could introduce ourselves in the presence of your aunt and my father. You cannot imagine the joy I feel at the thought of what is to occur. My heart beats. Your Mathurin"
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Do Beast In Space next! XD XP LOL.
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I read somewhere once that the film was intended as a short, and the whole beast sex scene was going to BE the film...but the whole thing got stretched out into this boring story about an inheritance.
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